Thursday, July 14, 2011

How I Found Him Online and You Can Too!


When I first arrived in Philly, I did some aggressive online-dating. I'm a hyper-social extrovert to begin with, moving to a new city where I had very few people I know, and starting a job with zero co-workers. This was to be my salvation.

Sure, it took a month and a half to find the right one, but what's that compared to the rest of my life? I had a great time going on several dates a week and corresponding with different men every day. I had absolutely no expectation going into the whole thing, except to find people to go see stuff and eat stuff with. Admittedly, I was getting tired of the constant meet and greets by the time He rolled around too. I'm still the awkward girl I was in the beginning, but I've lost almost all anxiety about first dates. I love throwing myself into strange social situations and dating it seems is no exception.

Lessons Learned On Dating Online
1. Don't hide anything about yourself. Flaunt it.
 Courting is a somewhat exhausting process. Especially as a woman, online dating affords plenty of fish. If there are things about yourself you're unsure of will attract or deter people, make them loud and clear! Then you won't have to waste your time on people that just don't get it.

2. Don't be nervous.
I've rationalized myself out of nervousness. Sure, I get a few butterflies before some dates that look uber promising, but I rest assured that if this isn't the one there are plenty more. Plenty plenty more. (update--- this is impossible if you have composure of a 12 year old girl which it seems describes me in a nutshell)

3. It's impossible to predict what someone is like in real life until you meet them.
I pride myself on being able to read people fairly accurately, so I was surprised to see how inaccurate online profiling can be. Sure having a correspondence will tell you a lot, but never the whole story. I had a rich month long correspondance with someone that turned out to be the Footstomper. I had an awkward forced correspondance with someone that I turned out to like a lot in real life. You just never know.

4. Take plentiful risks.
Take risks. Contact anyone you find yourself attracted to. What's the worst that can happen? There are so many more people you haven't met!

5. Cast your net wide.
 There are going to be your share of Scrawny Narcissists and Footstompers. Go on lots and lots of dates. Your probability of finding a keeper can only increase.

No comments:

Post a Comment